The beginning

It's time for me to stop writing. This blog has reached its natural conclusion and will no longer serve any purpose. It's been cathartic.

See you soon. And forever.

Liber ist...

Love is in the inspirations, the touch and the whisper. Love can unite and free you. If you can love the unlovable, you will feel the power of it. If someone doesn't love you, that's ok, love them anyway.

Foetal Imprisionment

I am plugged into the machine. Can you hear me? I have been living all my life inside a cocoon I had no idea I was in this corpsen shell. I head the clamouring outside but the dark, ebony waters dulled the noise. I could think, but I was trapped, which no amount of thumping could free me from this prison.

Days, weeks, months had gone by now. How long would I have to wait? Who would come and help me escape? Holy shit if I could just breathe! SOMEONE LET ME OUT OF HERE! but still nothing. Why do they laugh everytime I try to push my way out? Oh shit...

The walls are caving in. She, the walls are caving in. What the fuck am I going to do. The walls made of flesh, like an acid burned alien and filled with rotted fluid. Where am I anyway, how did I get here? I can't remember... I can't remember where I was before this hellish prison appeared.

Here it comes, I can here it coming. At the same time every day pulped food enters my body through a tube, I think they put that in me when I was unconscious, or wherever the hell I was before I got here. Wherever the fuck I was I must have done something terrible. Maybe I killed someone. Maybe I killed a newborn child or fought in a war and speared some guy because I was seriously pissed off.

I'm going to die in here. I'm going to die. The walls, they're caving in, they're coming in around me. God I really, really don't want to die in here. Oh no, NO God no, what the fuck is happening. The walls, the walls! SHIIIIT I'm out, fucking thank fuck I'm out! Waaaaaaaah!

Fuck, I can't speak. I can't talk any more. I can't talk, why can't I talk? The fluid's damaged my cornea I think. My senses seem dulled. I think they let me out but I'm not sure what the fuck they're going to do to me. The laughing, the inscesent laughing.

After a few days my body stops aching. I think the fuckers wrapped me in dough or some shit. I think they gave me narcotics, I can't move properly. I must have been in that fucking prison for ages.

Okay, my eyesight seems to be returning, I can hear a little more clearly. I can grab at things, I can hold onto a huge finge... shit, I'm a baby. I a goddamn motherfucking baby man. How the fuck did that happen? Wow! It's like I... I... wait, hang on a second. Fuck, that means that every time I die I'm actually... What was I saying. Oh yeah, I... What...

[blackout]

E. Pulman©2010

I don't like the drugs but the drugs like me.

I'd like to wallow in self pity if I may:

Fuck! These drugs are horrendous. Well, not the drugs, they were nice, but the withdrawal from them is heinous. I'm itching and restless, tired but can't sleep. In pain but so disgusted with these painkillers' effects that all I can do is toss and turn and get up and smoke more cigarettes.

Day 1 of not smoking weed: Meh, whatever. I'll have one when I have one.

Day 1 of not taking Tramadol: twitching, aching, restlessness.

Day 2 of not smoking weed: Yeah, I'll have an egg butty.

Day 2 of not taking Tramadol: Emotionally erratic, serious twitching, restlessness, aching etcetera etcetera.

I even tried wanking, which usually solves most problems let's face it. And for a few blissful moments I was realised from this nightmare of suffering. Wank number two was the same, and that's usually the one to send me off to a blissfull night's sleep.

That made me segway into thoughts about how men think they have exclusive rights on the word wank. Ha!

And fuck for that matter. Fucking does not require a penis to enter the vagina, despite what the rape laws say.

Oh, I dunno. Maybe I need an egg butty.

In search of The Light Bringer

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Korean_mythology

http://www.satanservice.org/graphics/

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Japanese_mythology

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hindu_mythology

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hindu_mythology

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Heruka

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Azazel

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cherub

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Euthyphro_dilemma

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Christian_mythology

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hermetica

http://www.conjure.com/COG/lore.html

http://www.frostydrew.org/observatory/courses/myths/booklet.htm

http://uncyclopedia.wikia.com/wiki/Atheism#Atheist_Mythology